comedy feature

Letter To Edinburgh: Marcel Lucont

The Fringe is quite an ‘international’ festival itself, you know; with that in mind, ThreeWeeks has invited visiting Fringe stars to write an open letter to you, the good people of Edinburgh (temporary or permanent). Here is Marcel Lucont from France.

Alors, here I am performing my first show at the Edinburgh Festival. By the time you read this you will probably have seen it, and may I take this chance to thank you for your compliments. You are correct, it is an excellent show.

Before to come here I must admit, I heard some negative things about the Festival. Some, they said to me it is difficult to find a place to stay; not true. On Thursday I found myself at the apartment of a German cabaret singer who not only provided my accommodation but also treated me to an exclusive falsetto staccato performance in her lounge, bathroom and then kitchen.

Friday I was persuaded not to sleep by a Russian puppet theatre company and an enormous sack of narcotics – those puppets are better conversationalists than one would think. And Saturday, I was invited to a one-bed apartment by a quintet of Australian actresses. Cosy, certainement, but they were very welcoming. And, like a boomerang, with the right weather conditions, I may return.

Also I have been very impressed with the standard of ‘groupie’ this Festival attracts. In France I am accustomed to receiving letters, gifts and lingerie on arrival at a venue. Here they will wait until after the show, and whisk me to the closest whisky bar. It is so direct. Always, of course, I am careful to observe their movements. A simple lack of concentration may result in something to be dropped into a drink. This led to a bizarre incident after a show in Germany. I missed my flight home by some days.

Some say there is an etiquette with the groupie; I say give them what they want. For them it is like a bonus song at the end of a compact disc; a little something extra after the main show which is unexpected but ultimately rewarding.

From conversations with some Scottish men I understand there is still some real resentment and hatred when it comes to the English. Truly, I admire the dedication. Me myself, I don’t hate the English. I choose simply to ignore most of them. This requires less energy, energy which can be used better elsewhere…

But definitely my life here so far is more pleasant than the last few months in London. The people are more friendly, the homeless more talkative, and the bars and cafes more appealing and helpful. After a while one tires of big cities such as London. I just don’t believe the phrase “how can I help you?’ should be a rhetorical question.


Marcel Lucont: Sexual Metro, 6 – 25 Aug (not 19), 10.20pm (11.20pm), prices vary, fpp74 .

published: Aug-2009

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